25.1.08

In defense of American underwear

I have had the need to defend American women's underwear on a few occasions, and now I am ready to make my case.

My Brazilian friends were complaining about not being able to buy underwear in the US because it is either enormous, as in, covering the entire bottom, or it is a thong, as in, string up your ass.

Brazilian underwear is somewhere in the middle. It is high cut across the tush essentially dividing each cheek in half--the same cut as the famous Brazilian bikini. While I fully support the Brazilian bikini for making your butt actually look smaller instead of encasing it in a sack, I cannot get behind Brazilian underwear for the following reason:

PANTY LINE

I have never scene such flagrant panty line abuse in all of my travels. When I explained to my Brazilian friends about why the thong exists and why American women are so paranoid about not letting people see their underwear from outside of their clothing, they all looked a little shocked and fully admitted to being in constant violation of VPL.

Brazilian underwear squeezes each cheek and due to its small size leaves a sizable indention in the tush, made all the more visible by tight polyester pants and spandex. Brazilian women are known for working what they got, and unfortunately prominent panty line goes along with it. In Brazilian underwear's defense, obviously panty line isn't a big deal here, so who cares? Let those lines show and be free! But alas, my culture does not feel that way and I am a product of my environment and cannot exhibit such freedom.

Now, the case for American underwear:

If you are wearing jeans or some non-tight fitting bottoms you can wear your big sack underwear, it is comfortable and no one in going to see it, but if you are wearing something form-fitting you have the option of a thong to minimize the VPL. It is about options, but of course, you have to know when to exercise those options and many woman simply fail at this step. American underwear doesn't stand the middle ground--it is all about extremes, but at those outer edges its job is being accomplished.


I rest my case.

No comments: